The Paddock Review

can we name this?

 

 

it’s living in a wintery mix, waiting on a diagnosis. 

not quite rain, not snow, not hail—but I can feel it: 

cold, sloppy, bone chilling. it leaves me damp when 

I dodge puddles down the drive to see if

   there’s news in the mailbox.

 

the wait on a name feels like spring’s dark leap forward, 

& I fumble the routine as I ready for work, my brain still

processing half-remembered dreams, pre-dawn coffee.

I am forgetting things, distracted by the exhaustion of

                                      trying to find an accurate name.

 

it’s a pleasure sounding Latin names in the seed catalog:

zinnia violacea of the family Asteraceae, paeonia of the 

Paeoniaceae family—but I can’t locate a picture that 

identifies the small green leaves that snake our grass,

                                       though I know its name exists.

 

as sure as I know around Mother’s Day the peony buds

will be near their bloom, zinnia seeds will push the soil,

unfurl lacy leaves, and the viny weed will battle new grass.

it takes patience, this discovery, & grit to endure the

                                      naming, making it palpable.

 

all warmth gone. still, in a cold moment—

 

 

This poem is from the chapbook It could account for the panic by Liz Whiteacre (Finishing Line Press), and c an be found at https://www.finishinglinepress.com/product/it-could-account-for-the-panic-by-liz-whiteacre/

What if seizures were catalysts for creativity? It could account for the panic is a collection of persona poems that leap from a composer’s experiences with Temporal Lobe Epilepsy (TLE), exploring the surreal, unpredictable nature of living with a neurological disorder. Through themes of adversity and resilience, the collection offers readers another perspective on disability and highlights our capacity to adapt, learn, and grow.